I have begun to hate those sentences that start off with "you know you're in love when...." They make me think that someone is trying to characterize love and that, to me, is completely impossible. I think that love is different for everyone. Something like "You know you're in love when you can't get that one person off your mind." Well, sometimes I can't get my little brother off my mind because I'm worried he's going to do something stupid somewhere, but that doesn't mean I'm in love with him. It just means that I care about him. For me, being in love shouldn't have to be characterized. It should just be something you feel. It should be something you're comfortable with, and even though I don't always talk about AJ or act like I "want" him, I think about him all the time and I actually don't just want him, I need him. I hate going to bed without talking to him, and even if I don't get to talk to him directly, I almost always send him a message telling him I miss him and telling him how much I love him. (Or try to tell him how much I love him)
It's crazy, because I wont be able to see him for two weeks, and I honestly didn't think I would miss him after only three days of not seeing him. I can usually go about 4 or so until I really start to miss him, but I guess the knowledge of me not being able to see him for two weeks, 14 days, is driving me crazy. I didn't realize I missed him until after I hung up the phone tonight and my stomach started hurting again (it was hurting earlier), and I was like "Whoa, that's crazy! I miss him so much that my stomach hurts." I almost started crying. I didn't think it would get this bad this soon. I'm scared of how it's going to affect me later on in the time period. I guess we'll just have to see.
Me and one of my best friends was talking earlier and she asked me "Don't you think love is amazing?" and I said, "Yes, it's breathtaking. Sometimes, when I think about him I can't breath and I get this smile on my face that doesn't go away for like 2 minutes." Love really is like that, or at least the love I'm in. It's wonderful and amazing, and I don't ever want to lose this. I don't think I'll ever be able to find another person to love like I love him. It's that kind of love that is indescribable. The kind of love that you use the stupid icon that says "Explaining why I love you is like explaining what water tastes like, impossible." The only word that comes to mind is amazing, but it's so much more than just amazing. There aren't any more words to descirbe it.
- Music:Bubbly- Colby Caillat
